8 smart phrases that will make you better at networking

A simple hello can lead to a million things. Know the right phrases to be successful.

Networking events are a great opportunity to make valuable contacts, professionally and personally. But many people stress over the pressure of trying to connect quickly and impressively with complete strangers. Some even stay away because they can't get comfortable with the idea.

It's definitely a situation that can prey on any insecurities you have, but if you prepare well, you can know that you won't be caught in a long weird silence or trying to think of something to say that doesn't sound awkward. Then you'll be ready not just for networking events but for company picnics, conferences, cocktail parties, and any other social events that take you outside your circle of family and friends.

Here are eight perfect icebreakers to learn and practice.

1. Hi, my name is . . .

Start with the basics. Put out your hand, flash a genuine smile, make eye contact, and introduce yourself. From there the person you're talking with will almost certainly share their name, and you're already off to a good start.

2. What do you do?

People love to talk about themselves. If you're inquisitive and curious, most people will pick it up from there and carry the talking. Again, it's a question of starting with the basics.

3. What business are you in?

A slightly different version of "What do you do?" Either can be appropriate, depending on the event and the person. You may even want to use both. If you learn that you're talking with an accountant, you can ask, "Are you with an accounting firm, or do you work for a business in a different industry?"

4. What do you like about your job?

Open-ended questions like this are a great follow-up, because they probably can't be answered in a couple of words. It reinforces positivity and communicates interest in their work.

5. How did you get started in this kind of work?

You can learn so much about someone if you hear even a bit about their journey instead of focusing exclusively on the here and now. And when people start telling their story, things can really get interesting.

6. What are you hoping to get out of this event?

Obviously this isn't a question to ask at, say, a birthday party for a board member, but if the focus is professional, it's worth a try. It gives the other person a chance to communicate something about themselves indirectly--is their answer funny, sarcastic, sincere, dismissive?

7. I love your work.

If you're talking with someone well-known, expressing admiration for their work can be a good starting place. From there, you can pivot into something more open-ended, like "I heard you speak about your new project at last year's conference--how is that going?" or "One of the ideas in your book really helped me through a rough patch . . . "

8. What advice would you give someone just starting out in your industry?

With an industry veteran or older person, an open-ended hypothetical like this can lead you to valuable insights. You may also want to ask how the industry has changed during the course of their career.
The bottom line is this: Be interested in learning more about others, and you'll always have something to ask. Be willing to engage in give and take and give something of yourself as well, and you'll soon wonder what it is you were so intimidated by.

The 5 telltale symptoms of career stagnation

Figure out if it’s just a lull or if your career has really hit a rut.

Caroline Zaayer Kaufman

If you feel like you’re doing your job on autopilot, you’re not alone. In 2015, only 32% of U.S. employees said they were actively engaged in their jobs, according to a Gallup Poll. For many people, that disengagement is tied closely to a sense that their career development is stagnating.
Please note, however, stagnation isn’t the same as disliking your job. When you truly hate your gig, you likely feel compelled to do something about it, says Anna S.E. Lundberg, a London-based career coach. “On the other hand, it’s those of us who are just plodding along, not hating our careers but also lacking any real engagement with our work who are likely to feel stuck and remain in a role or even a career that has no real future,” she adds. Stagnation, therefore, is far worse for one’s career since it doesn’t lead to any action.
Whitney Johnson, career coach at Harvard’s Executive Education program and author of Disrupt Yourself: Putting the Power of Disruptive Innovation to Work, uses an S-curve to illustrate how the various stages of a career might look: “At the base of the curve there is slow growth,” she says. “It takes time to master new information or skills. At this stage, what may feel like stagnation could in reality be growth, requiring patience and effort until things get more lively.”
If you can slog through that slow period, she says, you will rapidly grow and move up until you reach the top of the slope.  And that’s when actual stagnation becomes a real risk to your career. But how do you know if you’re in the good part of the S or the bad—or, whether what you’re experiencing is a natural slowdown or an actual career rut? If you answer “no” to three or more of these five questions, you’re stuck in the mud.

Are you motivated at work?

Everyone gets bored with work sometimes, but boredom shouldn’t be your everyday. If it is, your motivation will start to erode. Cue the career rut. Whether you know it or not, you need motivation to work hard. Without drive, your career growth is DOA.
If your performance has plateaued, you have no desire to learn anything new, and you don’t feel compelled to go beyond what’s strictly necessary to do your job, it’s time to do a little soul-searching to figure out why, says Marilyn Santiesteban, assistant director of career services at The Bush School at Texas A&M.
Maybe you’ve been doing the same tasks for too long; maybe you need to be challenged more. It’s important to figure out why you’re bored before you can tell truthfully whether you’re in a temporary lull or a not-so-temporary rut.

Has it been 4+ years since your last promotion?

If you’ve been in your position for that long with no promotion, then it’s probably not going to come, Johnson says. Management likes you right where you are.
Of course, it’s frustrating to be repeatedly passed over for steps up you feel you’ve earned, so you need to figure out why it’s happening. Perhaps your boss doesn’t know you’re interested in moving ahead, or maybe you need to learn a new skill or two to climb to the next step on the ladder. This calls for a frank conversation with the person above you to find out exactly what it would take to get ahead.
Maybe you’ve reached a ceiling in your organization, or if there’s no space for you to move up, Johnson says. And if so, hearing it may just be the call to action you need to move on.

Are you meeting new people at work?

If your company isn’t bringing in any new people and workplace events are always the “same old, same old,” then it might not just be you that’s stagnating.
Organizations can also plateau, but when they do, the careers of the company’s employees usually do also. So, while you can learn quickly in the right role with such a company, you’ll eventually stall out, as well, Johnson adds.
Check your organization as a whole for signs of stagnation, Santiesteban says. Look for flat sales, retooling of existing products or services rather than creating new ones, executive team members and senior management that have been around forever, or static or slightly shrinking market share.

Are your performance reviews exceptional?

If you’re consistently “meeting expectations,” you’re not “growing in your career.”
“Maybe things are not terrible, they’re just OK; fine,” Lundberg says. “Is that how you want to live your life? Sort of average, things plodding along but with no passion, no excitement, no real feeling of fulfillment?”
When everything you do at work is only average, it may be time to shake things up. Easier said than done: But you’re going to have to go a little above and beyond if you want to break free from the shackles of stagnation. Take on a new project, or at least give your next project your all.

Are you sure you want to stick around?

If you spend your days fantasizing about doing something else, whether it’s a childhood dream or simply changing companies or fields, it’s likely a sign that your career isn’t meeting fundamental needs for you, Lundberg says.
“If you dig into the underlying values behind these fantasies and plans, you may find what’s missing from your current career,” she says. “Is it a sense of freedom and independence, the ability to make your own decisions, an opportunity to learn something new, or is it a question of earning more or working less?”
If you can answer those questions, you might be able to re-inject some of those missing elements into your current career, she adds. On the other hand, if you have a passion you’ve been dreaming of following for years, then now may be the time to make it a reality.

9 things that make you look really unprofessional in meetings

In a survey, 47 percent of people said that the meetings they attend are not productive. Don't be the reason for an unproductive meeting.

Do you occasionally feel like your boss or other colleagues are displeased with your behavior in meetings? The impatient questions directed your way, the sharp glances with eyebrows raised, the attempts to shut you out of the conversation?

If the answer is "yes," chances are, there are things you are doing--or not doing--in meetings that make you seem unprofessional, perhaps without your even knowing it. Here are 9 of the most common behaviors that can make us look unprofessional in meetings.

1. Being late
Routine tardiness shows an inability to respect other people's time, no matter how well intentioned you may be. Even if you're just five minutes late, people notice if it happens often. Get in the habit of arriving at meetings a few minutes early so your team isn't always waiting for you.

2. Boasting
It's no secret that conceited people often talk the most and do the least. Employers and employees alike know that. Don't boast in meetings about accomplishing things before you have actually accomplished them. In fact, get out of the habit of boasting at all--you'll be more likable, and more professional.

3. Complaining
While it's all right to let the occasional complaint slip out every now and then, nobody likes the person who constantly complains about every assignment they are given. We are get tired and hungry and frustrated, however, we don't have to always vocalize it.

4. Showing off
Asking questions is definitely a good way to get attention. Asking too many questions--just to show off your knowledge--looks really unprofessional. Tone down the questions, and you'll give off the impression that you have it much more together.

5. Looking sloppy

Although meetings can be informal, showing up to one looking like you just rolled out of bed is not appealing. In fact, showing up to work looking sloppy every day is not appealing, period.

6. Playing hooky
We all take a day or two off work when we need it--whether it be for emotional, illness, or personal reasons. Doing this often--and on days when you know there will be meetings at which you should be present--reflects poorly on you.